Timing is Everything

People keep saying to me, "Enjoy this time!" referring to Sawyer's baby-hood. And just this morning I cried for 10 minutes when I realized that he'll be getting teeth in a mere 2 months(ish). But here's the real thing about being a parent: time becomes completely irrelevant. It's like Einstein would have had totally different theories if he had been a parent. There is no space-time continuum when a child is involved.

Sure, the popular notion that time just goes too quickly is still valid. Sawyer will be 5 months old on Monday. Who knew 5 months could actually fly by? So much has happened in 5 months, but I can still remember (muscle memory included) how it felt to sit in the back of the car on the way to the hospital October 29th, hating every minute and every bump.

But as soon as he starts crying, or at 1:30 in the morning when he wakes himself up screaming, every second ticks by like a bad slow-motion film maneuver. He's sad. He refuses to be comforted, for all of 5 minutes. But during those 5 minutes I manage to convince myself that this moment is going to determine the rest of his life. Because I let him cry he will grow up an untrusting deviant who believes his mother never truly loved him so how could he find love for the rest of the world????

And then it's over. He farts long and loud, and smiles at me as if I was the one to relased the pressure valve on his tiny tummy. He coos, tilts his head, and squints his eyes as his empty gummy mouth opens to smile and laugh. Why can't this moment feel as long as the last one? I just want to hold that exact second in my heart forever. But soon enough, the poop follows the fart and it's wipes and diapers everywhere and life moves on. I look up and it's 9pm already, time for the tubby and bedtime. Then all is quiet and I punch the "mom" time clock (for a few hours at least), and I miss him and can't wait for the next day to start again.

Bunch of Stuff

So, we just watched the House episode with Laura Prepon where she is a blogger who writes about her life in a way that's TOTALLY obnoxious, alienating her boyfriend, and telling "the truth" to her readers. Guys, if that turns into me, I hope someone will tell me.

By the way, I love the homepage for House that I linked to. That's the only time I've ever seen a picture of Hugh Laurie and found him even remotely attractive. TMI? Sorry.

In baby news, Sawyer is doing amazing. He's in this wonderfully perfect stage of being cute, easily confined, undisciplined, adorable, AND sleeping 10-11 hours a night with only one feeding (usually around 5am). We just bought all new clothes (12 month cloths because he weighs 20lbs), and started taking walks in the stroller. He LOVES walks. He doesn't sleep like a normal child, he stays wide awake, looking all around him. We also took him for a ride in the hiking backpack this week. Photos to come, as they're on Stephan's phone (my camera battery died). He loved that too, but the view of the back of Daddy's head was boring so he fell asleep.

With nicer weather comes more Montana homesickness. We tried to walk in a forest preserve, but I missed the solitude of the road West of Plevna. The air is also noticeably ickier. Some days it feels like breathing through a scarf. Maybe that's just the humidity that I'm not used to. We're trying to plan a trip back to Plevna/Baker in April! I'll be writing TONS about that when it happens, so look out!

About Some Friends

I know that the political and religous views of my readers are vast and varied... so I'm posting this knowing that some of you might not agree with it. Sorry, doing it anyway. I support the ability for gay people to be legally married in this country. If you don't, you might want to just skip this post.

Check out this website to read a sweet story about a friend of mine from high school. Actually, he's not really even technically a friend- I bet he doesn't remember me at all. Regardless, he is in love, and is going to get married. They registered with Crate and Barrel's Ultimate Wedding Contest along with tons of other people. It's become somewhat of a large controversy over there, and they are asking for positive support from anyone who cares to share it.

To vote, you do need to register your email address, which I did, but no junk email has resulted. If you don't wish to support them, please just don't click on the website. They only need positivie support right now.

Thanks!

[steps down off of soap box]

Crawling Back into My Hole

I'll have access to my next MPH (Masters in Public Health) class In less than an hour. It's Biostatistics. Whoow. So this'll be interesting to see how fit studying into being a mom. A friend of mine laughed at me, saying I reminded her of one of MTV's 16 and Prgnant girls. That's cute, there's only a 15 year difference! Oh yeah, and a responsible and wonderful Baby-Daddy.

So far, I love the few hours I get out of the house at The Welless Center doing Massage and Healing Touch. It's wonderful to touch people again: physically and emotionally. I can't wait to throw something exciting at my brain! Stephan is on his last of a 4 day stretch of working. He's tired, but it's nice for all of us to get into a routine.

The little man? He's doing a lot of talking lately. He looks us right in the eyes and babbles. There aren't many consanents yet, but the laughing and cooing is the best sound to my ears ever. I'm trying to catch it on tape. As soon as I do I'll get to share it! WARNING: cutest thing ever. Ever.



So far.

Hi People!

Overheard: In thr Car

Me: Wow! With the trees behind you, and the angle of the sun it almost looks like we could be driving to Glendive.

Him: Yeah-

[sound of tires squeeling, horns honking, and a lady screaming obscenities]

Him: Almost for a minute there, huh?