36 weeks

Pregnancy is like marathon training. It's EXACTLY like marathon training. You have this thing that's going to happen in the future, and you have months to prepare for it. There are books to read, foods to eat, exercises to do (or not, whatevs)... Instead of increasing mileage, there's increasing pounds on top of your body. It just gets heavier, and harder to move around. But the harder it gets, the closer you know you are to the finish line.

Also- there's the one big push at the end. The hardest day is the last day. And it's coming. And you know it's coming. And you're kinda scared, and pretty excited, and you're not quite sure if you'll be able to handle it, but you really can't turn back now.

The main difference???? Scheduling. If I told you someone was going to come to your house with a bull-horn and announce the start of your marathon while you were sleeping, or working, or shopping, or driving- and you wouldn't know when... just a vague idea of sometime in the next 4 weeks.... and then ready... set... GO! Marathon! 26.2.

The second difference??? The actual mileage. Maybe labor will last 5 hours (yay!! Sawyer was so easy!) or 15 hours, or... sigh... possibly closer to 20-24 hours. You won't know until it's over how long it actually will be.

Another similarity... pulling the plug. What if something weird happens and they have to do a C-Section? Breech baby? Weird infection? You'll get a DNF (did not finish) for the laboring, but you'll still get your medal for trying.

More similarities: heat an humidity are enemies of both. You need new, life-event-specific clothes that won't really be applicable at any other time. Hydration is key, as is going with the flow: preparation will only get you so far during the actual performance.

Final similarity: you want pictures of the whole thing, but the pictures will come out kinda wonky due to sweating.

Overheard: 10pm

Him: I found your grocery list. And I'm going to go now. What else do we need?

Me: I dunno. Look at the list.

Him: It just says "chicken." I need you to be more specific.

Me: It's for your lunches.

Him: So we need lunch meat?

Me: No. You just need food for lunch. I don't care what it is.

Him: So we don't need chicken?

Me: Well.......... We don't HAVE any chicken.

[And he stared at me for several minutes before I broke down laughing so hard I thought I was going into labor. I wasn't.]

35 Weeks

I figure it's time for a real picture....

Yes, this is full-frontal at 34 weeks. It's why I think it's a boy!

Haha! See!! 34 weeks! I keep marveling at how the front-view is so different from the side-view......

34 weeks, side view. Stephan wants to invent a pregnancy L bracket.

I have tried to take a few walks lately- nothing more than one mile. I get all sweaty and exhausted. I've been doing the squats, 10 every time I go to the bathroom (which turns into a lot of squats!) Even though we have 5 more weeks- technically- I started to get nervous and I washed a bunch of clothes and diapers (we do cloth) and packed a hospital bag. The first time we did this, the Sawyer was born less than 5 hours after I started labor. The doctor predicted 1/2 the time for this one which leaves us... not a ton of time to gather resources.

Of course, saying that means it will be 3 days of labor. But I've started to see the light at the end of the feeling-terrible tunnel. A few more weeks and everything will be so different. I know I'll miss this a lot- the sitting- the ice cream- the one-on-one with Sawyer- the peace and "dwuiet" (that's what Sawyer calls it, it rhymes with quiet). 

It's also a quiet, weird type of confidence to know that I have all the tools to get back into shape as soon as I'm ready. Last time, I had never run a marathon, or followed a training plan, or been fitted for running shoes. I'm starting a lot further ahead this time than before. Also, sidewalks. And no snake season in the city. 

Bad A$$ Mother....

I went for a walk!! Yay me!! A one mile, brought my water bottle with me, sucked it up and just freaking walk, walk. It felt really good. And it realigned my brain again, which I missed. Here's what my brain came up with today:

I still wear a necklace my sister-in-law bought me for my birthday. It says, Run. I kept wearing it to remind myself that I'm still a runner. There is still a runner, somewhere, deep inside all this pregnant-ness. And as I walked, I listened to my old running playlist that's filled with punk rock, heavy metal, rawrrrrrr music. And I thought, Yeah. That's still me. That's how I run, that's how I live, and that's how I'm going to have this new baby (we've been working a lot on labor and delivery plans this week).

When it was Sawyer's turn to be born, our doctor in Montana worked with us very closely to make sure we selected all the options we wanted so his birth was awesome for us. We knew we wanted music, but I couldn't decide what I would need to hear at the time. I had two playlists: one of Enya and New Age, and one of country and rock and roll. When she came into the room and the Zac Brown band was playing she stated simply, "Huh, that's not where I thought you'd go with this."

So anyway, being inspired by the dulcet tones of the White Stripes, I realized that what really defines me, what makes me a Runner, why I'm still tough (despite all of the resting and sitting), is desire. DESIRE. It's why Stephan claims he's not a runner, running is just something he does. He doesn't have the DESIRE.