Step #3 (in the Steps for recovering after a truly unsettling tragedy happens) is Gather with like-minded people.
This morning I attended a lecture by one of the pastors at my church about a program she runs that helps parents of other-abled children take a night off. It's a great program. This post isn't about that program (which can be found here).
This post is about me leaving my house 1-3 times a month, dragging Adam to the church-provided babysitter, and sitting in a room with other women for about 2 hours. I'm lucky to have found a church that aligns exactly with what my values are. So when I go there, I feel 100% nurtured and accepted. I can blurt out whatever insane thing my mind comes up with- and I know I'm safe. The catchphrase for the church is, we are a NICE Church: Nurturing, Inclusive, Connecting, Empowering.
Someone this morning asked why we haven't been to children's choir lately. Instead of making up something like, "we've been really busy" or "you know, just life" and making an empty promise to try to make it more often, I looked her in the eye and told the exact truth, "We've been having a lot of trouble with Sawyer lately, and we've decided to pause our extra activities until we can figure out how to help him be ok with himself and the world around him."
The week after the November election, I sat at a table as a leader of a group of women, and we all took deep breaths and cried. We said all the things we'd been holding in so we could appear strong to our families and "not crazy" to our friends. We just let it out, and brainstormed next-steps, and I felt better as I was leaving.
Don't get me wrong- everyone needs their close circle of friends. Jesus is there when there's even just two of us together (how did this post get so religious today???). But when there's more, and you can look around and know an entire pyramid of people share your dreams for our Earth and our future and our children, THAT'S the empowerment you need to keep going in tough times. Stronger Together. I'm SO glad I took the social-situation risk a while back and started Gathering with women. I've gotten SO much more out of it than I ever imagined I would.
Showing posts with label Parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Parenting. Show all posts
Tuesday, January 17, 2017
Wednesday, December 28, 2016
Things I Don't Post to Facebook
Since it's been a whole year since I last posted, I feel like I'm shouting down an empty hallway.
Let me catch you up. In 2016 I....
~closed up my "daycare" (because seriously, worst. idea. ever.)
~helped raise $1000+ for DetermiNation
~ran a little
~drank a lot
~was elected secretary for our church's women's group
~started working at a high-end spa and actually making adult money
~gained a little weight
~went on a diet
~continued worrying about my kids' mental health
~started meditating with more consistency
~found a new friendship soul mate in my son's best friend's mom
~continued therapy
~ran a little more
~was on TV with DetermiNation
~quit DetermiNation
~rejoined DetermiNation
~tread water most of the year
I don't think there's a roadmap for how to recover from 2016. I've tried little things here and there. I created a List of 5 things to do while recovering from a tragedy (e.g. the 2016 election).
Step 1: Self-care
Step 2: Donate something
Step 3: Gather with supportive people
Step 4: Research and decide where your talents are best used
Step 5: Change the World
That's all I've got. I want to write more. Because I miss it. And because creating time to sit still needs to be on my 2017 list.
Let me catch you up. In 2016 I....
~closed up my "daycare" (because seriously, worst. idea. ever.)
~helped raise $1000+ for DetermiNation
~ran a little
~drank a lot
~was elected secretary for our church's women's group
~started working at a high-end spa and actually making adult money
~gained a little weight
~went on a diet
~continued worrying about my kids' mental health
~started meditating with more consistency
~found a new friendship soul mate in my son's best friend's mom
~continued therapy
~ran a little more
~was on TV with DetermiNation
~quit DetermiNation
~rejoined DetermiNation
~tread water most of the year
I don't think there's a roadmap for how to recover from 2016. I've tried little things here and there. I created a List of 5 things to do while recovering from a tragedy (e.g. the 2016 election).
Step 1: Self-care
Step 2: Donate something
Step 3: Gather with supportive people
Step 4: Research and decide where your talents are best used
Step 5: Change the World
That's all I've got. I want to write more. Because I miss it. And because creating time to sit still needs to be on my 2017 list.
Tuesday, December 22, 2015
Caution: I've Been Drinking
This is about being married. I know a few people who are getting married in the next 12 months. And I've been married for 7 years (maybe 8.... it's almost midnight and I'm not prepared for counting).
If you're one of those people, think about this please.... When you're "getting married" to this person, you're signing up for SO much more than a wedding, maybe a house, probably kids. You are essentially saying to that other person....
I'm ok with washing your clothes.
I'll be awake with you at 1am wrapping Christmas presents for our kids while watching stand-up and drinking rum out of wine glasses.
It's cool that I know where your 8th grade dinner-dance was.
You like eating Spam sometimes, and I won't move out when I have to smell it.
Maybe you'll always put your toothbrush away wet and that means that MY toothbrush will be in contact with your toothbrush-water. And I'm ok with that.
We will naturally know who will hold the vomiting child and who will gather necessary materials (i.e. wash cloths, rags, buckets, thermometer). And sometimes we will switch to keep things interesting.
Occasionally we will text each other instead of talking because we are in different parts of the house and we don't want the kids to know what we are really thinking because it involves swearing.
I'll always save the last drink's worth of your alcohol in the bottle, and find something else to drink for myself. Because I love you.
I'm going to wear your clothes in emergency situations.
I'm going to look at you some days with a look that says, "I can't do this anymore" and you'll know that I need to walk into another room. And you'll take the kids to the store and when you're back you'll just hold me and let me cry and not tell me that it'll be ok because you know I might not believe you tonight. But that I might believe you tomorrow so you just let me be for right now.
Other days I'll get a text that you're going out for drinks with your friend after work and I'll actually go to sleep earlier because I know you need to eat wings and drink beer, and that you'll come home and be happy you're married to me and not anyone else's wife. Because really, other guys have it much worse.
And we'll teach Sunday School together.
And we'll cook together.
And we'll plan things. And execute those plans. And plan more things, and decide that we don't have to do EVERYTHING. And we'll help each other get dressed to go out. And I'll tell you if you have hair growing on your ears, and you'll tell me I have a zit on my back, and I'll throw away your really thin underwear and you'll laugh when I try to shove underwire back into a bra.
And we'll hold each other and cry sometimes because we know that life goes really fast and that however much time we've been given with each other will NEVER EVER EVER seem like enough. And that one day one of us will be gone and the other one will be alone. So we'll stay awake another hour tonight just knowing that for right now, we have everything we need.
That's what being married means.
If you're one of those people, think about this please.... When you're "getting married" to this person, you're signing up for SO much more than a wedding, maybe a house, probably kids. You are essentially saying to that other person....
I'm ok with washing your clothes.
I'll be awake with you at 1am wrapping Christmas presents for our kids while watching stand-up and drinking rum out of wine glasses.
It's cool that I know where your 8th grade dinner-dance was.
You like eating Spam sometimes, and I won't move out when I have to smell it.
Maybe you'll always put your toothbrush away wet and that means that MY toothbrush will be in contact with your toothbrush-water. And I'm ok with that.
We will naturally know who will hold the vomiting child and who will gather necessary materials (i.e. wash cloths, rags, buckets, thermometer). And sometimes we will switch to keep things interesting.
Occasionally we will text each other instead of talking because we are in different parts of the house and we don't want the kids to know what we are really thinking because it involves swearing.
I'll always save the last drink's worth of your alcohol in the bottle, and find something else to drink for myself. Because I love you.
I'm going to wear your clothes in emergency situations.
I'm going to look at you some days with a look that says, "I can't do this anymore" and you'll know that I need to walk into another room. And you'll take the kids to the store and when you're back you'll just hold me and let me cry and not tell me that it'll be ok because you know I might not believe you tonight. But that I might believe you tomorrow so you just let me be for right now.
Other days I'll get a text that you're going out for drinks with your friend after work and I'll actually go to sleep earlier because I know you need to eat wings and drink beer, and that you'll come home and be happy you're married to me and not anyone else's wife. Because really, other guys have it much worse.
And we'll teach Sunday School together.
And we'll cook together.
And we'll plan things. And execute those plans. And plan more things, and decide that we don't have to do EVERYTHING. And we'll help each other get dressed to go out. And I'll tell you if you have hair growing on your ears, and you'll tell me I have a zit on my back, and I'll throw away your really thin underwear and you'll laugh when I try to shove underwire back into a bra.
And we'll hold each other and cry sometimes because we know that life goes really fast and that however much time we've been given with each other will NEVER EVER EVER seem like enough. And that one day one of us will be gone and the other one will be alone. So we'll stay awake another hour tonight just knowing that for right now, we have everything we need.
That's what being married means.
Friday, December 18, 2015
It's Electric (LONG post)
I know how muscle fibers work. There's a sodium/potassium pump that exchanges electrical charges, producing a pulse that stimulates muscle fibers to contract. To build muscle, you stimulate these fibers so much that they break down. When the body goes to rebuild the fibers, it adds more this time so the body is better prepared for the work you're probably going to ask it to do next time. This process hurts some- it definitely produces soreness. And you, as the human in charge, can usually feel it when you're exerting yourself enough physically to get stronger.
So here's my question: how do we get emotionally stronger? Is it a brain-chemical thing? Like you shoot through your chemical connections enough and your body begins preparing a stronger response for the next time?
Here's why I'm asking... over the last few years I've had a bunch of moments when all I can think of is, "This is hard and I hate it." Times when it feels difficult simply to exist in the current situation. It's hard to be in my body. It's hard to breathe in and out and stand up and walk to the kitchen. It feels the same as trying to do 25 squats, or 30, or 50. Toward the end, it's hard and it hurts- physically. Sometimes, life hurts mentally/emotionally.
But then we get stronger. Right? You push yourself to do those last 5 squats- and it's easier the next time you do squats. You get to the kitchen and wash the dishes, and next time it's..... here's where the analogy breaks down. Because sometimes it's easier, but sometimes it's harder and you just never make it into the kitchen and your husband gets home and you're on your 3rd episode of Intervention and you both end up staying awake until midnight cleaning the kitchen and getting ready for the next day.
And here's the other part: parenting. Parenting is the hardest exercise I've ever done. Because there's poop. And laundry, and cooking, and crying, and banged heads/knees/toes, and whining, and more crying and laughing, and kissing, and napping, and snuggling, and loving, and powerful joy, and awe-some pride. All of these things happen in an hour. It's like emotional High Intensity Interval Training.
New Therapist recently told me that the best thing an adult can do with a kid is to witness their emotions. Acknowledge that what they feel is real, live in that feeling so they really learn about it, and help them move through it safely. That's a LOT of 'feeling' every day. As I've been doing it the last few weeks (with three to four kids a day in daycare) I'm wondering if I'm building up my 'feeling' muscles. I have no idea how to answer it. But it's interesting to think about.
So here's my question: how do we get emotionally stronger? Is it a brain-chemical thing? Like you shoot through your chemical connections enough and your body begins preparing a stronger response for the next time?
Here's why I'm asking... over the last few years I've had a bunch of moments when all I can think of is, "This is hard and I hate it." Times when it feels difficult simply to exist in the current situation. It's hard to be in my body. It's hard to breathe in and out and stand up and walk to the kitchen. It feels the same as trying to do 25 squats, or 30, or 50. Toward the end, it's hard and it hurts- physically. Sometimes, life hurts mentally/emotionally.
But then we get stronger. Right? You push yourself to do those last 5 squats- and it's easier the next time you do squats. You get to the kitchen and wash the dishes, and next time it's..... here's where the analogy breaks down. Because sometimes it's easier, but sometimes it's harder and you just never make it into the kitchen and your husband gets home and you're on your 3rd episode of Intervention and you both end up staying awake until midnight cleaning the kitchen and getting ready for the next day.
And here's the other part: parenting. Parenting is the hardest exercise I've ever done. Because there's poop. And laundry, and cooking, and crying, and banged heads/knees/toes, and whining, and more crying and laughing, and kissing, and napping, and snuggling, and loving, and powerful joy, and awe-some pride. All of these things happen in an hour. It's like emotional High Intensity Interval Training.
New Therapist recently told me that the best thing an adult can do with a kid is to witness their emotions. Acknowledge that what they feel is real, live in that feeling so they really learn about it, and help them move through it safely. That's a LOT of 'feeling' every day. As I've been doing it the last few weeks (with three to four kids a day in daycare) I'm wondering if I'm building up my 'feeling' muscles. I have no idea how to answer it. But it's interesting to think about.
Monday, November 23, 2015
1-2-3, 1-2-3, Count. With. Me.
Week 2. I mean, Week Whatever since I started this daycare thing 4 months ago with a healthy break in September/October.
Ya'll. This is not easy. No one napped today. And everyone wanted their Mommies. Even me for a while. The bar I aim to hit moves constantly. Do you know what a circle is? Can I work it so that only one child is crying at a time? 4 diapers in 20 minutes (I only have 3 kids here so....)?
The good news: Everyone eats. Everyone poops. Everyone survives the day.
The better news: I haven't lost it yet. Well, not while the kids are here. I did a bit of drinking over the weekend, with Stephan, in the kitchen, over the Christmas planning/budget/ordering. But 8 hours of work is manageable. Because time marches on. 4:30 arrives. Every day. No matter who's pooped, who threw grapes, who tried to eat rubber bands (all of these are my own kid). 4:30 happens, and then it's just me and mine (which, again, isn't always easy either, but my standards are much lower for my own kids).
8 hours goes pretty fast. Sometimes it's the 3-5 minutes of triple crying that can feel super slow. And when that happens, we all just take a breath and Count. With. Me.
Ya'll. This is not easy. No one napped today. And everyone wanted their Mommies. Even me for a while. The bar I aim to hit moves constantly. Do you know what a circle is? Can I work it so that only one child is crying at a time? 4 diapers in 20 minutes (I only have 3 kids here so....)?
The good news: Everyone eats. Everyone poops. Everyone survives the day.
The better news: I haven't lost it yet. Well, not while the kids are here. I did a bit of drinking over the weekend, with Stephan, in the kitchen, over the Christmas planning/budget/ordering. But 8 hours of work is manageable. Because time marches on. 4:30 arrives. Every day. No matter who's pooped, who threw grapes, who tried to eat rubber bands (all of these are my own kid). 4:30 happens, and then it's just me and mine (which, again, isn't always easy either, but my standards are much lower for my own kids).
8 hours goes pretty fast. Sometimes it's the 3-5 minutes of triple crying that can feel super slow. And when that happens, we all just take a breath and Count. With. Me.
Tuesday, November 17, 2015
.... All Through the Town
Dude. You guys. I was in full-on mental-meltdown-mode last weekend. My 8 weeks off of "work" (i.e. the daycare kid was at home because her mom had a baby) ended. And I was freaking out because I had no idea how I was going to handle three kids in my house:
A 2 year old
My 1 year old
A 2 month old
Sunday I kicked Stephan out of the house and prepped lunches and dinners for the whole week. It took 3 hours. Curriculum for the week (this is a circle; it goes round and round) was another 30 minutes, and cleaning, laundry, furniture moving was the last hour.
And yesterday and today were easy.
I mean, not easy, but it wasn't hard. The baby cried. Adam was mad that I wasn't holding him and decided he wanted to nurse all day. The little girl stared deeply into my eyes and calmly told me "I'm not doing that" when I asked her to put something away. But they all slept (never at one time), they all ate (always at the same time), and no one cried for more than 5 minutes before I could empty my hands and pick them up. And at the end of they day I zoomed through each room to tidy up, cleared the sink of dirty dishes, folded the laundry and prepped the next day's lunch/dinner.
And the circle... it DID go round and round!!! And I... can TOTALLY do this! Why did I think I couldn't do this?? Stephan knew I could do it. The parents knew I could do it (or at least appeared to when they handed me their kids and a check). And I'm not just not failing. I'm kinda rocking this. That little girl totally knows what a circle is (despite telling her dad tonight that it was a heart). That baby drank 9oz of milk. And Adam......... well, he's asleep so let's just be happy with him not hitching his own ride to a grandparent's house yet.
A 2 year old
My 1 year old
A 2 month old
Sunday I kicked Stephan out of the house and prepped lunches and dinners for the whole week. It took 3 hours. Curriculum for the week (this is a circle; it goes round and round) was another 30 minutes, and cleaning, laundry, furniture moving was the last hour.
And yesterday and today were easy.
I mean, not easy, but it wasn't hard. The baby cried. Adam was mad that I wasn't holding him and decided he wanted to nurse all day. The little girl stared deeply into my eyes and calmly told me "I'm not doing that" when I asked her to put something away. But they all slept (never at one time), they all ate (always at the same time), and no one cried for more than 5 minutes before I could empty my hands and pick them up. And at the end of they day I zoomed through each room to tidy up, cleared the sink of dirty dishes, folded the laundry and prepped the next day's lunch/dinner.
And the circle... it DID go round and round!!! And I... can TOTALLY do this! Why did I think I couldn't do this?? Stephan knew I could do it. The parents knew I could do it (or at least appeared to when they handed me their kids and a check). And I'm not just not failing. I'm kinda rocking this. That little girl totally knows what a circle is (despite telling her dad tonight that it was a heart). That baby drank 9oz of milk. And Adam......... well, he's asleep so let's just be happy with him not hitching his own ride to a grandparent's house yet.
Sunday, October 18, 2015
Quick Check-in
I'm alive. (If that's what you'd call it)
The baby turned one year old and I realized I haven't slept more than 4 hours in a row for a full twelve months. And then it got worse. We're up every 2-3 hours. Still. I never dreamed I'd still be in "survival" mode after 13 months. The good news is that we are all still alive (except, I guess, for the cat). Food gets made. Showers and baths get taken (though not quite as often as we'd hope). Clothes are clean (most of the time, but it's not the end of the world if they're not).
Birthday parties, vacations, marathon cheering, homework, school events, ballet classes, church, Sunday school, and a few dinners with friends (Ok, just one of those) are still happening. Life is still happening.
Things that aren't happening:
running
thinking
sleeping
organizing
planning
arriving at appointments on time
showing up in the appropriate city for the appointment(s)
correctly addressing birthday cards
reading, writing, hobbies of any type
preparing for the future
Megs2.0 (the new therapist) insists that this too, shall pass. But dude, it's been 13 months. Of wheel-spinning. One day the baby will sleep. Or move out. One of those things will happen.
Probably.
The baby turned one year old and I realized I haven't slept more than 4 hours in a row for a full twelve months. And then it got worse. We're up every 2-3 hours. Still. I never dreamed I'd still be in "survival" mode after 13 months. The good news is that we are all still alive (except, I guess, for the cat). Food gets made. Showers and baths get taken (though not quite as often as we'd hope). Clothes are clean (most of the time, but it's not the end of the world if they're not).
Birthday parties, vacations, marathon cheering, homework, school events, ballet classes, church, Sunday school, and a few dinners with friends (Ok, just one of those) are still happening. Life is still happening.
Things that aren't happening:
running
thinking
sleeping
organizing
planning
arriving at appointments on time
showing up in the appropriate city for the appointment(s)
correctly addressing birthday cards
reading, writing, hobbies of any type
preparing for the future
Megs2.0 (the new therapist) insists that this too, shall pass. But dude, it's been 13 months. Of wheel-spinning. One day the baby will sleep. Or move out. One of those things will happen.
Probably.
Thursday, August 20, 2015
Day Care Week #1
So many thoughts. This week was amazing. It really did unlock some weird part of my energy-level that sucked the most out of every day. Every morning I woke up to the alarm (?!) and got myself ready first thing. Fed and dressed the baby and the two of us opened the drapes and the door to the day care room at 7:45. Stephan was in charge of getting Sawyer out of bed and ready for the day- a job I'll have starting next Thursday when he's in school full time.
BUT it's been amazing to have a segmented day- and a list of chores that get finished at specific times. About 20 minutes of meal/lunch/snack planning per week.... and another 20 minutes of project/song/art planning sets up the week to run on auto pilot. There have also been surprises!!
~ We found some bubbles. Day over.
~ Chalk is too messy for causal use.
~ My washing machine takes 40 minutes per load.
~ One art project, one large-motor activity, and one song is often TOO MUCH for a 9 hour day.
~ We eat something every 2 hours, which burns 30-45 minutes at a time.
~ Girls sit still. Often.
~ Someone else's kid is fascinating.
Some other things that have been surprises are not so great:
+ It's tough to wake up at work.
+ When there's no time for makeup I feel different.
+ Being 30 minutes late with a meal melts everyone down.
+ Three kids eat a LOT of fruit in 4 days.
+ I'm tired.
So it's good that it's Thursday night, the dishwasher is running, the laundry is working its magic, I've got an iced drink in front of me, and tomorrow I sleep in a little. In a few months we add one (and then two) infants. So it's good that we are getting the routine set up with the bigger kids now. All in all, daycare might be the best thing I never thought I needed. Some people get their energy from being in groups, or being alone... I think I might get mine from following a daily schedule.
BUT it's been amazing to have a segmented day- and a list of chores that get finished at specific times. About 20 minutes of meal/lunch/snack planning per week.... and another 20 minutes of project/song/art planning sets up the week to run on auto pilot. There have also been surprises!!
~ We found some bubbles. Day over.
~ Chalk is too messy for causal use.
~ My washing machine takes 40 minutes per load.
~ One art project, one large-motor activity, and one song is often TOO MUCH for a 9 hour day.
~ We eat something every 2 hours, which burns 30-45 minutes at a time.
~ Girls sit still. Often.
~ Someone else's kid is fascinating.
Some other things that have been surprises are not so great:
+ It's tough to wake up at work.
+ When there's no time for makeup I feel different.
+ Being 30 minutes late with a meal melts everyone down.
+ Three kids eat a LOT of fruit in 4 days.
+ I'm tired.
So it's good that it's Thursday night, the dishwasher is running, the laundry is working its magic, I've got an iced drink in front of me, and tomorrow I sleep in a little. In a few months we add one (and then two) infants. So it's good that we are getting the routine set up with the bigger kids now. All in all, daycare might be the best thing I never thought I needed. Some people get their energy from being in groups, or being alone... I think I might get mine from following a daily schedule.
Thursday, August 13, 2015
Day Care Day #2
At some point last week I realized that I would be learning a lot from the kids I would be watching. Before our first official start, I learned that the children would NOT be spending the whole day in the "day care room." Little Girl (LG) took a complete tour of my house, dirty laundry and everything, within the first hour. Areas I had planned to be off limits (really, everywhere, so I didn't have to clean my house every day) were explored, and declared fit for playing in.
Lesson #2 was about scheduling. My pretend "9am art class, 10am snack time" turns out to be completely fluid, within a 20 minute grace period.
Lesson #3 is buy more coffee. We ran out this morning and my heart sank in a way I was not expecting.
Lesson #4, screen the art supplies before letting them near the kids. We accidentally played with non-washable markers today. LG's favorite color is purple. So..... the kid looks totally bruised across her hands and arms. Sigh. Her dad says it's no big deal. But the hand-print on my wall may disagree.
Lesson #5. Just keep moving. I'm not sure if I'll have the energy to maintain the schedule of the last two days, but as I sit here after 8pm on Thursday evening, 90% of my house is totally clean. Because, apparently, I can have my own kids crawling around on a dingy, dog-hair-matted kitchen floor, but the minute I see LG trailing a tuft of fur I freak out and vacuum the whole place.
I had assumed the "give the work to the busiest person" theory was going to kick in. Maybe it already has. Laundry is put away. Dishes all done. Fridge full of food. I love the routine I've set up for the boys and me to get the day started and ended. Actually, I just love routine. And maybe I've created the day care so everyone around me will finally have to bow to my master plan. All of you? In bed by 8. Daycare starts at 7:30am!!!
Lesson #2 was about scheduling. My pretend "9am art class, 10am snack time" turns out to be completely fluid, within a 20 minute grace period.
Lesson #3 is buy more coffee. We ran out this morning and my heart sank in a way I was not expecting.
Lesson #4, screen the art supplies before letting them near the kids. We accidentally played with non-washable markers today. LG's favorite color is purple. So..... the kid looks totally bruised across her hands and arms. Sigh. Her dad says it's no big deal. But the hand-print on my wall may disagree.
Lesson #5. Just keep moving. I'm not sure if I'll have the energy to maintain the schedule of the last two days, but as I sit here after 8pm on Thursday evening, 90% of my house is totally clean. Because, apparently, I can have my own kids crawling around on a dingy, dog-hair-matted kitchen floor, but the minute I see LG trailing a tuft of fur I freak out and vacuum the whole place.
I had assumed the "give the work to the busiest person" theory was going to kick in. Maybe it already has. Laundry is put away. Dishes all done. Fridge full of food. I love the routine I've set up for the boys and me to get the day started and ended. Actually, I just love routine. And maybe I've created the day care so everyone around me will finally have to bow to my master plan. All of you? In bed by 8. Daycare starts at 7:30am!!!
Tuesday, July 28, 2015
And the Hits just Keep on Coming!!
To answer a few follow-up questions from my last post:
~The new career path (Ha! Melanie, I should just call you!!) is.... dah dah dah DAH!!! I'm starting a daycare in my home. For an entire year I've been trying to make the massage thing happen profitably while leaving Stephan's schedule to be his crazy schedule, and not wasting all my income on babysitting. While I still LOVE massage, and continue to study and experiment with bodywork, for an income it's been tough. Add to that the desire to spend as much time as I can with the new baby.... and Yay! We happen to have two neighbors expecting new babies this fall, and one of them already has a small one needing day care. So it will be a slow start, but I'm SO excited!! I've been spending the last month on websites, borrowing books, chatting up other daycare owners, and putting together the resources and knowledge base to make this a really fun and educational experience for everyone. Even more than "keeping them alive," I hope I actually can help the bigger ones to learn a little more about how the world works.
~Running is amazing!! I'm still in 2+ year old shoes and the aches and pains are mounting, but I've pulled in some 10 minute miles, and added some stroller-cross-training to the mix. With the Fitbit I've been watching my steps and really try to hit the 10,000 step goal every day. That has meant a LOT of walks to the grocery store (1.8 miles round trip!), to the park (0.8 round trip, but I can usually pace back and forth enough in an hour to get up to 2+ miles), and up and around the park district while swim lessons happen. Add to all that the diet tweaks (vegetarian-based!!) and I'm down 10 lbs since May!!!
Hopefully this year I can start sleeping more- that's a giant goal. We have a few more weeks to get the baby's schedule dialed in before kindergarden starts, and the rubber meets the road with the daycare. I remember working a full time job. It was busy, but stressful in the good "checking stuff off the list" kind of way. Cheers to that being the case in the next 10 months!!!!
(Sorry for the exclamation points. Maybe that sleeping thing isn't quite put together yet)
~The new career path (Ha! Melanie, I should just call you!!) is.... dah dah dah DAH!!! I'm starting a daycare in my home. For an entire year I've been trying to make the massage thing happen profitably while leaving Stephan's schedule to be his crazy schedule, and not wasting all my income on babysitting. While I still LOVE massage, and continue to study and experiment with bodywork, for an income it's been tough. Add to that the desire to spend as much time as I can with the new baby.... and Yay! We happen to have two neighbors expecting new babies this fall, and one of them already has a small one needing day care. So it will be a slow start, but I'm SO excited!! I've been spending the last month on websites, borrowing books, chatting up other daycare owners, and putting together the resources and knowledge base to make this a really fun and educational experience for everyone. Even more than "keeping them alive," I hope I actually can help the bigger ones to learn a little more about how the world works.
~Running is amazing!! I'm still in 2+ year old shoes and the aches and pains are mounting, but I've pulled in some 10 minute miles, and added some stroller-cross-training to the mix. With the Fitbit I've been watching my steps and really try to hit the 10,000 step goal every day. That has meant a LOT of walks to the grocery store (1.8 miles round trip!), to the park (0.8 round trip, but I can usually pace back and forth enough in an hour to get up to 2+ miles), and up and around the park district while swim lessons happen. Add to all that the diet tweaks (vegetarian-based!!) and I'm down 10 lbs since May!!!
Hopefully this year I can start sleeping more- that's a giant goal. We have a few more weeks to get the baby's schedule dialed in before kindergarden starts, and the rubber meets the road with the daycare. I remember working a full time job. It was busy, but stressful in the good "checking stuff off the list" kind of way. Cheers to that being the case in the next 10 months!!!!
(Sorry for the exclamation points. Maybe that sleeping thing isn't quite put together yet)
Tuesday, June 30, 2015
"You think you can do these things, Nemo, but you JUST CAN'T!!"
Stephan and I lived through 24 hours that, while completely our fault, was some of the toughest hours we've ever survived. (Not counting all the hours we haven't survived yet?)
We've been on vacation. We were vacationing in southern Missouri, where my family congregates once a year to sit at the pool and catch up while drinking beer at 10am. But when that vacation was over, our trip was just ramping up:
5am: baby wakes up
6am: make coffee
9am: leave for fish hatchery
10:15am: arrive at fish hatchery (temp = 96 degrees F)
10:30am: feed fish
10:45 am: hike up a mountain with a baby wrapped to me
11:45am: re-live our youth by talking to strangers
12:10pm: arrive at water park and drink shakes
12:20pm: begin sliding down concrete water slide
12:21pm: walk up hill to slide down again
12:23pm: slide down again
12:24pm: walk up again
[this repeats until 1:20pm]
1:20pm: manage preschooler fit
2:30pm: arrive back at pool and swim
4:30pm: out of pool. Begin packing
5:30pm: finish packing
6:15pm: baby smashes his face into the floor and bleeds everywhere
6:30pm: still bleeding
6:45pm: bleeding is stopped, time for dinner
8:00pm: drive away from rental house
9:15pm: stop at Walgreens for Orajel so baby can eventually eat again
9:30pm: cross into Arkansas
I can't honestly tell you the order of events after that. I know Stephan was driving. I stayed awake with him until about 12am, you know, for moral support. We stoped about every 2 hours to feed the baby, or let someone go to the bathroom. But then...
2:30am: sketchy rest stop in Alabama.... Stephan tries to find bathroom and is directed to a gated, fenced, padlocked enclosure at the edge of the property, with only one "women's" room, in disrepair, with two mystery doors that appear to be locked.
4am: Stephan asks me to drive
5am: the sun comes up
6am: I start crying in a McDonalds parking lot because I'm so tired I'm seeing things
6:30am: Stephan starts driving again while I sob sleepily next to him, disappointed I can't drive my shift this morning
8:00am: I get back behind the wheel.
10:30am: I'm done. Apparently I'm swerving so much that Stephan feels uncomfortable letting me drive.
12:30pm: We arrive at DeFuniak Springs, Florida.
At that point we visited Stephan's aunt, who lives in a nursing home there. We manage to finish driving to Destin, Florida, where a condo on the ocean awaits us. We heat up some left over chili (yes, we brought leftover chili on this trip) and take Sawyer down to the beach for his first ever encounter with The Ocean. After the driving we did, and the crying I did, the moment we all four held hands as the vastness of The Ocean met the miracle of our first son, at sunset, it was.... there might not be any words. I took a picture with "the camera in my mind" and we mostly just stood there letting the incoming tide remind us how big our world is.
One of the lessons from that day was this: some things are just different now. Stephan and I can no longer power through a 14-hour drive and expect the kids to fit into our plan. We used to drive 14 hours to and from Montana 3-4 (or more) times a year. But we have to admit that, at least for the near future, our driving days need to be shorter. It's a big shift for us. We once drove straight from Chicago to Oklahoma city, and then to San Diego, only stopping briefly. That's just not us anymore. But "worth it" is so fantastically, actually AWEsomely, not even close to what we get to do instead.
We've been on vacation. We were vacationing in southern Missouri, where my family congregates once a year to sit at the pool and catch up while drinking beer at 10am. But when that vacation was over, our trip was just ramping up:
5am: baby wakes up
6am: make coffee
9am: leave for fish hatchery
10:15am: arrive at fish hatchery (temp = 96 degrees F)
10:30am: feed fish
10:45 am: hike up a mountain with a baby wrapped to me
11:45am: re-live our youth by talking to strangers
12:10pm: arrive at water park and drink shakes
12:20pm: begin sliding down concrete water slide
12:21pm: walk up hill to slide down again
12:23pm: slide down again
12:24pm: walk up again
[this repeats until 1:20pm]
1:20pm: manage preschooler fit
2:30pm: arrive back at pool and swim
4:30pm: out of pool. Begin packing
5:30pm: finish packing
6:15pm: baby smashes his face into the floor and bleeds everywhere
6:30pm: still bleeding
6:45pm: bleeding is stopped, time for dinner
8:00pm: drive away from rental house
9:15pm: stop at Walgreens for Orajel so baby can eventually eat again
9:30pm: cross into Arkansas
I can't honestly tell you the order of events after that. I know Stephan was driving. I stayed awake with him until about 12am, you know, for moral support. We stoped about every 2 hours to feed the baby, or let someone go to the bathroom. But then...
2:30am: sketchy rest stop in Alabama.... Stephan tries to find bathroom and is directed to a gated, fenced, padlocked enclosure at the edge of the property, with only one "women's" room, in disrepair, with two mystery doors that appear to be locked.
4am: Stephan asks me to drive
5am: the sun comes up
6am: I start crying in a McDonalds parking lot because I'm so tired I'm seeing things
6:30am: Stephan starts driving again while I sob sleepily next to him, disappointed I can't drive my shift this morning
8:00am: I get back behind the wheel.
10:30am: I'm done. Apparently I'm swerving so much that Stephan feels uncomfortable letting me drive.
12:30pm: We arrive at DeFuniak Springs, Florida.
At that point we visited Stephan's aunt, who lives in a nursing home there. We manage to finish driving to Destin, Florida, where a condo on the ocean awaits us. We heat up some left over chili (yes, we brought leftover chili on this trip) and take Sawyer down to the beach for his first ever encounter with The Ocean. After the driving we did, and the crying I did, the moment we all four held hands as the vastness of The Ocean met the miracle of our first son, at sunset, it was.... there might not be any words. I took a picture with "the camera in my mind" and we mostly just stood there letting the incoming tide remind us how big our world is.
One of the lessons from that day was this: some things are just different now. Stephan and I can no longer power through a 14-hour drive and expect the kids to fit into our plan. We used to drive 14 hours to and from Montana 3-4 (or more) times a year. But we have to admit that, at least for the near future, our driving days need to be shorter. It's a big shift for us. We once drove straight from Chicago to Oklahoma city, and then to San Diego, only stopping briefly. That's just not us anymore. But "worth it" is so fantastically, actually AWEsomely, not even close to what we get to do instead.
Friday, May 29, 2015
What, What??
The weirdest synchronicity just happened.
The kids both fell asleep at the same time. At 4pm.
I have a babysitter scheduled for 4:30 to watch them while I do a massage at the house. So at 4 I kinda freaked out. What do I do now? My mind started spinning. Quick! Pay bills! No! Fix your hair! Laundry! Sleep (can't do that, too little time)! Drink wine (that one was autopilot)! Check Facebook!
So I have 10 minutes now. And my brain exploded so hard that I figured I would catch the moment here. The babysitter is here. The boys are asleep. I have nothing to do for 10 minutes. It's.... like the universe is about to implode with quiet.
8 minutes now......
The kids both fell asleep at the same time. At 4pm.
I have a babysitter scheduled for 4:30 to watch them while I do a massage at the house. So at 4 I kinda freaked out. What do I do now? My mind started spinning. Quick! Pay bills! No! Fix your hair! Laundry! Sleep (can't do that, too little time)! Drink wine (that one was autopilot)! Check Facebook!
So I have 10 minutes now. And my brain exploded so hard that I figured I would catch the moment here. The babysitter is here. The boys are asleep. I have nothing to do for 10 minutes. It's.... like the universe is about to implode with quiet.
8 minutes now......
Tuesday, May 26, 2015
Product Review
Because it's 9:30pm and BOTH BOYS ARE ASLEEP IN BEDS. Yes. We did the sleep training stuff with the baby over the long weekend and lots of prayers and whatever other magic happened and he got with the program within 20 minutes the first night. Since then it's been amazing. He cries for not even 5 minutes and is out for up to SIX HOURS. Yes. He slept for SIX HOURS the other night.
Anyway, for Mother's Day my mom gave me a Fitbit One. She asked me to research Fitbits for her, and when I compared and contrasted them online we came up with the two most useable ones. She kept one, and gave me the other one. I waited an entire month to write this just to make sure I loved it as much as I thought I did.
And I do. I love that I can see my steps during the day. I love that I can stuff it in a pocket while I'm doing massage (although it doesn't count massaging as "stepping" so that's a bummer). I TOTALLY love the app that I'm addicted to where I input all my foods and water for the day and it automatically tracks my calories in vs calories out. I've never been good at counting calories. And maybe I'm still not great at it. But it's been amazing for me to see what foods I eat a ton of for almost no calories (air-popped popcorn anyone??) and what foods I indulge in that cost me an entire day of walking (french fries are the DEVIL). I'm a numbers person, so I'm totally motivated by thinking about the calorie deficit I need to maintain in order to lose weight.
So far I've lost 6lbs this month.
The saddest part is realizing that the old saying of "weight is lost in the kitchen" is completely true. I once ate french fries for lunch and figured I would just walk them off later. Nope. 3 miles later I wasn't back to baseline. Food is SO much easier consumed than burned.
I'm still not running, so getting the 5 miles (about 10,000 steps) a day is really hard. Luckily, when I sit on the exercise ball to soothe the baby it thinks I'm walking, so I can get a few extra steps in that way. I don't feel like it's cheating since bouncing takes a lot of coordination and core strength.
Wow. A coherent blog post. See what happens with sleep and a quiet house??? I may run for president next.
Anyway, for Mother's Day my mom gave me a Fitbit One. She asked me to research Fitbits for her, and when I compared and contrasted them online we came up with the two most useable ones. She kept one, and gave me the other one. I waited an entire month to write this just to make sure I loved it as much as I thought I did.
And I do. I love that I can see my steps during the day. I love that I can stuff it in a pocket while I'm doing massage (although it doesn't count massaging as "stepping" so that's a bummer). I TOTALLY love the app that I'm addicted to where I input all my foods and water for the day and it automatically tracks my calories in vs calories out. I've never been good at counting calories. And maybe I'm still not great at it. But it's been amazing for me to see what foods I eat a ton of for almost no calories (air-popped popcorn anyone??) and what foods I indulge in that cost me an entire day of walking (french fries are the DEVIL). I'm a numbers person, so I'm totally motivated by thinking about the calorie deficit I need to maintain in order to lose weight.
So far I've lost 6lbs this month.
The saddest part is realizing that the old saying of "weight is lost in the kitchen" is completely true. I once ate french fries for lunch and figured I would just walk them off later. Nope. 3 miles later I wasn't back to baseline. Food is SO much easier consumed than burned.
I'm still not running, so getting the 5 miles (about 10,000 steps) a day is really hard. Luckily, when I sit on the exercise ball to soothe the baby it thinks I'm walking, so I can get a few extra steps in that way. I don't feel like it's cheating since bouncing takes a lot of coordination and core strength.
Wow. A coherent blog post. See what happens with sleep and a quiet house??? I may run for president next.
Sunday, May 17, 2015
Breathe
Maybe it's because I now have two boys, but everything lately is centered around the bathroom.
This morning I was volunteering at a marathon and had to stop at the starting line to pick up a bunch of stuff. I was hoping to be quick enough to miss the start of the race, but I was about 45 seconds too late. As I was trying to turn my car onto the course, the first runner crossed in front of me and I knew I was about to watch the world's most boring parade.
So I backed out of the car line and parked it. I started walking back to the start line to hit the porta-poties since there would be no line. I thought to text the people I was meeting that I was stopping at the bathroom, or Stephan, or.... no. No one needs to know where I'm going.
As I sat in that porta-potty, I realized that no one but God knew where I was. It might be the first time in months that I wasn't trackable. And it was weird. And awesome. "No one knows where I am right now!!!" was a thought that kept circling my brain. It was so cool.
Honestly, it was hard to leave the john. Except for the terrible smell and being inches away from other peoples' poop.... I would have stayed in there for a really long time. I'm going to hold onto that memory for at least a few weeks.
Then later, Stephan saw me get completely frustrated with the boys (it was 10pm and they were both awake). He shoved me into the shower ("but I already took a shower today!"), and handed me a glass of iced gin and cherry juice. I started to just scrub the day off, but then stopped. The soap I use is hand made from natural ingredients. I held my hands over my face and just inhaled the smell of the actual lavender buds in the almond scrub.
It hit me... I paid WAY too much for this stuff to shower quickly. I took a lot of time to pick the products for their ingredients and scent... why not make sure I use up every smell I paid for? So I opened each bottle and pretty much just huffed my entire bathing routine. I love smells. And, of course, I stepped out a whole new person.
Really, the bathroom is the center of my home.
This morning I was volunteering at a marathon and had to stop at the starting line to pick up a bunch of stuff. I was hoping to be quick enough to miss the start of the race, but I was about 45 seconds too late. As I was trying to turn my car onto the course, the first runner crossed in front of me and I knew I was about to watch the world's most boring parade.
So I backed out of the car line and parked it. I started walking back to the start line to hit the porta-poties since there would be no line. I thought to text the people I was meeting that I was stopping at the bathroom, or Stephan, or.... no. No one needs to know where I'm going.
As I sat in that porta-potty, I realized that no one but God knew where I was. It might be the first time in months that I wasn't trackable. And it was weird. And awesome. "No one knows where I am right now!!!" was a thought that kept circling my brain. It was so cool.
Honestly, it was hard to leave the john. Except for the terrible smell and being inches away from other peoples' poop.... I would have stayed in there for a really long time. I'm going to hold onto that memory for at least a few weeks.
Then later, Stephan saw me get completely frustrated with the boys (it was 10pm and they were both awake). He shoved me into the shower ("but I already took a shower today!"), and handed me a glass of iced gin and cherry juice. I started to just scrub the day off, but then stopped. The soap I use is hand made from natural ingredients. I held my hands over my face and just inhaled the smell of the actual lavender buds in the almond scrub.
It hit me... I paid WAY too much for this stuff to shower quickly. I took a lot of time to pick the products for their ingredients and scent... why not make sure I use up every smell I paid for? So I opened each bottle and pretty much just huffed my entire bathing routine. I love smells. And, of course, I stepped out a whole new person.
Really, the bathroom is the center of my home.
Tuesday, May 12, 2015
New Rule
Read books, not magazines.
I have a confession. Don't tell my husband. The "stomach problems" I had last weekend were mainly my desire to finish reading a very good book I had started last week. It's the first book I've finished in months. Maybe since the baby was born. I found myself drinking a ton of water, just to read a few more pages. The few minutes every few hours or so were like stealing time. It was kinda nice.
So my new rule is: Read books, not magazines when I'm in the bathroom. Books are better for you anyway... right?
I have a confession. Don't tell my husband. The "stomach problems" I had last weekend were mainly my desire to finish reading a very good book I had started last week. It's the first book I've finished in months. Maybe since the baby was born. I found myself drinking a ton of water, just to read a few more pages. The few minutes every few hours or so were like stealing time. It was kinda nice.
So my new rule is: Read books, not magazines when I'm in the bathroom. Books are better for you anyway... right?
Thursday, April 16, 2015
Had it.... Lost it... Found it
The baby (who is 7 months old already!!) doesn't sleep for more than 2 hours at a time. This has been true for his entire (short) life. He once slept for 4 hours. I remember that one night in January. It hasn't happened since.
As if that wasn't tough enough, he's been sick for three days and waking up every 40-60 minutes stuffy and coughing and generally, infantly, pathetic. I'm so beyond tapped out that I may have hallucinated slapping a bee off of my leg yesterday, and even in my dreams (when I have them) I'm trying to fall asleep.
A few nights ago (or hours, who really knows at this point?) I read a blog article about "the one thing that changed parenting for me forever." When I read it I wanted immediately to share it here, if only to have it saved forever. And now I can't find it. And googling, "parenting blog life changed forever" only yields several millions of results.
Anyway, the point of the article was: a woman was struggling with a baby that was very fussy and kept her from doing housework and generally, getting life done. A friend of hers looked at her situation and suggested that she reframe it. Maybe the baby was her primary job, and the work she was doing could come second. (It seems elementary now that I type this out.)
And it's true. When Adam was tiny and had the screaming colic for 5 hours every night I knew and prepared for it. It wasn't a struggle for me because I could prepare for it. I set up snacks for myself, entertainment for myself, put on comfortable clothes and "did colic" every night for 5 hours.
Cut to today.... I looked at my daily schedule and noticed that everything that I do after 3:30pm has been a struggle lately. Clearing the kitchen table from toys... getting dinner ready.... occupying the 5 year old..... carrying around the baby...... And I spent the morning setting up the afternoon. I put dinner on the stove to simmer before 3pm. I had the house ready for playing and snuggling (i.e. vacuumed and straightened) and accepted that anything that wasn't done by 3pm wouldn't get done.
And it didn't. And I felt totally fine with that. By the time I got to 8pm and the bedtime routine, I was the calmest I've been in weeks. And as icing on this idealogue cake.... Adam fell asleep on the floor next to me as I was typing this. So even he is on-board with this plan.
As if that wasn't tough enough, he's been sick for three days and waking up every 40-60 minutes stuffy and coughing and generally, infantly, pathetic. I'm so beyond tapped out that I may have hallucinated slapping a bee off of my leg yesterday, and even in my dreams (when I have them) I'm trying to fall asleep.
A few nights ago (or hours, who really knows at this point?) I read a blog article about "the one thing that changed parenting for me forever." When I read it I wanted immediately to share it here, if only to have it saved forever. And now I can't find it. And googling, "parenting blog life changed forever" only yields several millions of results.
Anyway, the point of the article was: a woman was struggling with a baby that was very fussy and kept her from doing housework and generally, getting life done. A friend of hers looked at her situation and suggested that she reframe it. Maybe the baby was her primary job, and the work she was doing could come second. (It seems elementary now that I type this out.)
And it's true. When Adam was tiny and had the screaming colic for 5 hours every night I knew and prepared for it. It wasn't a struggle for me because I could prepare for it. I set up snacks for myself, entertainment for myself, put on comfortable clothes and "did colic" every night for 5 hours.
Cut to today.... I looked at my daily schedule and noticed that everything that I do after 3:30pm has been a struggle lately. Clearing the kitchen table from toys... getting dinner ready.... occupying the 5 year old..... carrying around the baby...... And I spent the morning setting up the afternoon. I put dinner on the stove to simmer before 3pm. I had the house ready for playing and snuggling (i.e. vacuumed and straightened) and accepted that anything that wasn't done by 3pm wouldn't get done.
And it didn't. And I felt totally fine with that. By the time I got to 8pm and the bedtime routine, I was the calmest I've been in weeks. And as icing on this idealogue cake.... Adam fell asleep on the floor next to me as I was typing this. So even he is on-board with this plan.
Tuesday, March 31, 2015
And What Does Daddy Teach You?
Last month Sawyer spontaneously started telling me what each member of our family teaches him.
"Mommy teaches me to be kind... Amma teaches me to write the school way..."
And what does Daddy teach you?
"A lesson."
There's a group of diaper commercials going around that shows a stereotyped mom being more permissive and comfortable with a second baby than a first baby (less hand sanitizer, more grease and dirt the second time around). It's funny. And pretty accurate. But isn't that how we all handle the "second" anything? That first marathon training program I followed to the digit. I think I missed two runs, and I agonized over each of them. A few months later I ran a 1/2 marathon and pretty much did half the scheduled workouts. You just understand what you can get away with after you've done something once.
And the other thing you realize the second time around? That you really know nothing. If you can survive something following every rule, and then survive it again following only half the rules.... the thing is just survivable no matter what you do, or how you do it. I was SO judgmental of other runners while I was training for that first race. And maybe it's time I admit that I had a fair amount of things I thought about (that I thankfully didn't say out loud to) other parents when I was just a mom-of-one.
But by now, "whatever works, dude," is pretty much my life motto. Second baby = second race = second career = second time around at anything... It hits me constantly that the terrible Jersey Shore motto of "you do you" is actually pretty brilliant.
If you add to all of this that "you" is unique in every moment, at every time and stage, "doing you" can turn into a really zen directive.
Today's lesson: you totally got this. Whoever "you" are. Whatever "this" is.
Thursday, March 12, 2015
Things I Want
**NOT in order of importance
-New running shoes
-The baby to sleep through the night
-To run outside
-To walk outside
-To do anything outside
-To fit into my smaller pre-Adam jeans
-A self-cleaning fish tank
-Time to read a book
-Scandal to be on Hulu so I can find out what my friends are talking about
-To lay on a beach by the ocean and get a guilt-free tan
-New running shoes
-The baby to sleep through the night
-To run outside
-To walk outside
-To do anything outside
-To fit into my smaller pre-Adam jeans
-A self-cleaning fish tank
-Time to read a book
-Scandal to be on Hulu so I can find out what my friends are talking about
-To lay on a beach by the ocean and get a guilt-free tan
Monday, March 2, 2015
How Tired Were You?
This morning I was so tired...
I wore my husband's pants for three hours (to the grocery store and then pre-school pickup) before realizing I hadn't simply "lost a bunch of weight in a really weird way."
I wore my husband's pants for three hours (to the grocery store and then pre-school pickup) before realizing I hadn't simply "lost a bunch of weight in a really weird way."
Thursday, February 12, 2015
"Your Perfect Baby"
I've been mentally collecting phrases for a few weeks now. "Your perfect baby" is one of them. "He's always smiling!" and "He just never cries does he?" And the one that really helped me put this all together, "All his pictures on Facebook are so beautiful!"
Well, duh. I get to pick what pictures get put on the internet... and I'm not going to pick ones where he is screaming his head off. Also, who takes pictures of babies screaming their heads off?? The face we present to the world is not usually the "I'm falling apart" face. (Or even the macaroni-pants face) Of course I "look nice" when I'm at church... if I didn't get to comb my hair, I would probably stay home. And yeah, those pictures you see are really cute. I chose the nice ones.
Facebook is not "RealLife book." Can you just imagine if a camera took random pictures of you during the day and posted them to the internet?? Holy bells- that would show a totally different life. I think that's the point of all of those "you never know what's going on beneath the surface" quotes. Because yes, this baby has been known to cry for 4-6 hours at a time for no reason. And yes, he's been eating every 90 minutes this week. Have I showered lately?? I'll get back to you. But I really hope that people aren't looking to the "profiles" of their friends on the internet to compare their life and get the truth of reality.
Maybe I'll give up quotation marks for Lent.
Well, duh. I get to pick what pictures get put on the internet... and I'm not going to pick ones where he is screaming his head off. Also, who takes pictures of babies screaming their heads off?? The face we present to the world is not usually the "I'm falling apart" face. (Or even the macaroni-pants face) Of course I "look nice" when I'm at church... if I didn't get to comb my hair, I would probably stay home. And yeah, those pictures you see are really cute. I chose the nice ones.
Facebook is not "RealLife book." Can you just imagine if a camera took random pictures of you during the day and posted them to the internet?? Holy bells- that would show a totally different life. I think that's the point of all of those "you never know what's going on beneath the surface" quotes. Because yes, this baby has been known to cry for 4-6 hours at a time for no reason. And yes, he's been eating every 90 minutes this week. Have I showered lately?? I'll get back to you. But I really hope that people aren't looking to the "profiles" of their friends on the internet to compare their life and get the truth of reality.
Maybe I'll give up quotation marks for Lent.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)