I'm writing this on Friday evening, after a really emotional day in our country. Just... really emotional. If I were to try to type out what's going on in my brain it would echo this post by The Onion which has lots and lots of swearing in it, but definitely gets its point across.
I'm also 18 days into a run streak. That means that I've logged at least one mile every day for the last 18 days. The goal was to continue it until January 1st. But tonight.... I just can't leave the house. I had a really hard time leaving my son's bedroom, even though he was sound asleep. I seriously contemplated spending the night on the floor next to his bed.
Is that a symptom of mental illness? I don't think so. When I typed the other day that there are some things you just can't outrun- I had no idea I would actually mean it now. My brain just can't look away. There's no escaping this one tonight. I just keep turning to the skills I've been practicing the last few weeks, and praying- actually praying- that... I don't even have words yet. I'll have to get back to you.