Him: I had a patient today who was Bipolar.
Me: I or II?
Him: Just one guy. Oh, wait, no. Bipolar I.
Him: And it made me glad we're just dealing with the #2. Which reminds me, did you make the appointment?
Him: Why not?
Me: Ok. So, listen to this. I have a reason. I know I've waited tooooooo long to make an appointment with a new therapist, BUT I have a reason. A real one. Because... I mean.... what do they even do anyway?
Him: This is not a real conversation.
Me: No! Really!! Like, I get that, like, medicine can change the serotonin in your brain... and massage can affect your heart rate... but, like, just talking to someone? What does that even do?
Him: It doesn't matter.
Me: Yeah it does.
Him: You still don't know how the microwave works, but you use it every day.
Me: This is different.
Him: I feel SO bad for your old therapist. You are a very difficult patient. Also, remember the time you told him therapy is just 'placebo effect'?
Me: Well....... it kinda is.
Him: It doesn't matter. Make the phone call. You're impossible.