Monday, September 13, 2010

Seriously?! THIS makes me miss Montana??? SEROUSLY?!?!?!


How to deal with the first day of a flea infestation in 25 easy steps**:

Step 1. Identify enemy
Step 2. Formulate plan
Step 3. Dress appropriately
Step 4. Sequester pets as best as possible
Step 5. Laundry
Step 6. Wipe down surfaces
Step 7. Vacuum
Step 8. Tear apart all furniture
Step 9. Empty all rooms
Step 10. Eat something & drink a pop
Step 11. Cry
Step 12. Contemplate moving
Step 13. Dip into emergency fund for supplies and cash ($400 so far)
Step 14. Bag up every cloth item that’s not nailed down and bring to Laundromat
Step 15. Bleach bathroom (maybe not necessary, but definitely needed it)
Step 16. Buy booze
Step 17. Ask help from in-laws
Step 18. Try to take a nap
Step 19. Leave for work, hope that things get better in the next 5 hours
Step 20. Totally forget about the fleas
Step 21. Come home, happy that some progress has been made
Step 22. Beer
Step 23. French Fries
Step 24. Beer
Step 25. Sleep

**I actually typed the first 7 steps for myself just so I could look at them to know what to do next. After only 3 hours of sleep and about 2 dozen flea bites on my back and legs, the enormity of the situation completely overwhelmed me and I reverted to my obsessive list-following days.

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